potential definitions of self-esteem:
- determination of individual values
- belief in abilities |confidence in the result of an activity: “ i can do”
- conscious/unconscious beliefs about yourself
- when the challenge meets the skills
self-esteem as opposed to value:
- value is not the same as confidence, in that value is permanent
- self-esteem and context (is self-esteem context-dependent?)
self-esteem in life vs. self-esteem in job (the latter does not presuppose the former)
- fundamental self-esteem vs. confidence due to a specific skill
- assuming skill in one area counts for everything in life
- the ‘fake it ’til you make it’ phenomena
- would we have self-esteem if we were alone on the Earth?
- self-esteem is good for socialising
self-esteem vs. doubt
- fear of rejection is connected to self-esteem
- are doubt and self-esteem related?
- doubt- leads to innovation – opens you up to self-reflection
- doubt opens up to questioning (therefore not that bad)
- doubt is healthy UNLESS IT INHIBITS action
- doubt/ bad self-esteem can also be “good” for society (that is, for the people in power in a society – those with bad self-esteem are easily manipulated)
not directly related to self-esteem but a fascinating notion nonetheless 🙂
- I and you = an encounter
- I and it = an experience (digital ‘encounters’ with people fall into THIS category)
JOAN DIDION ON SELF RESPECT
- To have that sense of one’s intrinsic worth which constitutes self-respect is potentially to have everything: the ability to discriminate, to love and to remain indifferent.
- To do without self-respect, on the other hand, is to be an unwilling audience of one to an interminable documentary that deals with one’s failings, both real and imagined, with fresh footage spliced in for every screening.
PRESSURES TO CONFORM
- reasons we follow passively (instead of trusting ourselves) in democracy – the majority tends to have ‘right’ on their side. Except do they?
- why we tend to appease the boss – because s/he pays your rent
- people decide what is normal and what is abnormal and persecute those that don’t fit.
SOCRATES’ LOGIC ON TRUTH (might be helpful for us in understanding and evaluating our own selves)
- look around for statements that make common sense
- try to find an exception in this statement
- if an exception is found, then your statement is false or imprecise
- nuance the original statement so it’s more accurate
- try to find exceptions until you can’t any more
- TO WIT: the truth lies in statements that are impossible to disprove
MONTAIGNE ON SELF-ESTEEM
- 3 main areas of inadequacy
- bodily inadequacy
- the inadequacy of being judged and disapproved of
- intellectual inadequacy
(according to Montaigne having a mind is not helpful because:)
- it makes for awkward relations with our bodies – we process outer stimulii with our minds that don’t jive with our bodies.
- having brains leads us to feel arrogant and to want to impose our views on others
- intellectual – the painful sense that we aren’t as clever as we should be.
- Trying to think of yourself as a good person – or encouraging children to think that way – dramatically raises the stakes of every action taken, as each one gets taken as evidence for or against that belief.